Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Parental Detox

Alex has been locked up for a little over 2 weeks. Between jail, and detox I hope he is settling down. When he got out of detox and I took him to the residential center he got a couple of weeks in jail for dirty UA. This last weekend he was transferred out of the jail an into the residential center. It's still a part of the department of corrections but I think of it as jail in a dorm room. They seem to have programs to help if he wants help. I personally feel that if he doesn't want the help and truly doesn't want to change then the next stop is probably a full blown prison. He'll be in the residential center for 6 months

Here is more info about the Johnson County Residential Center at this link: http://corrections.jocogov.org/adult/residential.shtml

It takes a while for Dad and Mom to detox from the situation too. I honestly believe addicts have absolutely no concept as to what their addiction does to those people close to them. We are living in a toxic environment. Maintaining healthy relationships with other family members, friends, and with each other is a struggle. Luckily we have good support when we need it but for many it is so hard to relate to as what it is like having a child addicted, unless of course you have been there. And I wish no one had to be there.

I'm not looking for sympathy and I don't want this to sound like a pity party but we have been through a lot in our lives. The deaths of parents, long term illnesses with cancer of family members, loss of multiple jobs due to plant closings and downsizings and the typical trials and tribulations of everyday life. Absolutely nothing has been as devastating as this issue of addiction.

I read a blog of an addict that I follow. I am angry and left a comment that probably she will be angry about. This addict is honest and states she really doesn't want to quit. But when she got caught by the law she calls good old mom to bail her out. Mom has to front $5000 for bail and then she has the nerve to ask for more money so she can get another fix. I guess each person has to make their own decision but if you want to use, don't call "us" when you are in trouble. Sit in jail until your court date and leave us alone. But this is what I meant earlier when I said addicts have no concept as to what they do to those around them, and I don't think they care.

Like I said, Dad and Mom are detoxing now. Dad is going on a motorcycle ride in less than 2 weeks. Leaving on Friday after next. If anyone see's a big red Harley heading south towards Springfield, MO and on though Arkansas to Memphis and east to Tupelo and Birmingham AL, and back up through TN and KY then back to KC. Give a wave and stop me, we'll have a coffee.


clean and crazy said...

I hope you have a marvelous time riding that motorcycle. It sounds like you need the rest.

Gledwood said...

I think the western governments have a v mixed-up view of and approach to the so-called "war" on drugs... most of the "fighting" is done with an attiude that the war is unwinnable + speaking as a drug addict who's trying to get clean you get constant mixed messages, e.g. govt. sponsored needle exchanges. Were it not for a ready supply of clean needles from the local pharmacy I can't see that I'd ever have taken up injecting heroin. O! But hindsight and the addict's mind are rife breeding grounds for would-have-beens...

Gin said...

Take this detox time and enjoy it as best as you can. The motorcycle trip sounds awesome! Have a great time, but be safe!

MEM said...

I'm the partner of an addict, and I can relate to most everything you said in this post. Addicts have no idea what it's like for their loved ones. It is SO difficult but so crucial for us to maintain our other relationships and intersts. Have some fun. You deserve it.

Lou said...

Gledwood, I love ya, but that comment is ridiculous. Needle exchanges don't turn people into heroin addicts. Less than 1% of the population will ever stick a needle in their arm to get high. Injecting is a line most never cross, and if you are that person you would prefer a clean needle..but if push come to shove, you will take whatever you can get.
The result of that (in the US) is taxpayers paying even more for addiction in the form of medical costs for HIV, hepatitis, etc.

Come on, hon, you just wrote a post about injecting in your leg in a phone booth..

ChaiLatte said...

Parental Detox, yes... I get that.

I have an idea- throw Mom on the back of that red Harley with you and cross a few more state lines our way. C'mon, it's only to California!! : ) Just think, we could meet up with Debby (Oxy & Opiate Addiction-A Mother's Story) and we could all detox TOGETHER!!

Seriously, have a fun, safe trip!

Annette said...

I agree with Chai....won't you come to Ca for a cuppa joe?!

Dad and Mom said...

I actually considered coming to CA and riding the Pacific Coats Highway but it was too far ofr the time available


To both of you, hope you have a great time on the Harley. I agree with ChaiLatte both of you should go, but in the absence of time one go then the other.
Getting away now and then is what has kept us sane? Or at least functioning.

sKILLz said...

Most addicts don't really care when there using how there addiction affects others around them.
Most of the time it is when they become sober, even if for a few, they realize how hard of a time they put onto there loved ones.
It's a hard thing.
I hope he is getting his shit together