I've always been a guy that fathers day, mothers day, valentines day and all those "days" are pretty much Hallmark Holidays. That's what I call them. Commercialized to bolster the coffers of card makers, restaurants, florists and jewelry stops.
What do sons know about being a father? I had no idea until I had been a father for a long time. Quite frankly I am not sure I understood until after my father had passed away. Then all of a sudden I am it. No one to provide that example, no answers at the end of a phone line. You are it. Then something strange begins to happen. As you learn you begin to grow. You begin to understand the wisdom that was demonstrated by the most ordinary things. Learning when to say nothing, learning when to be demanding and when to be patient, learning when to be a father and when to be a friend.
My father passed away when I was 27, I am now 53, almost half my life. The oddest thing I have ever seen a dead man do, the longer he lies there in his grave the smarter he becomes. All of those dad things and dad lessons begin to make sense.
What does this have to do with a fathers day with your son incarcerated. Deep down I believe in my son. I believe that one day the lessons I have tried to instill will make sense. I believe he has a life in front of him that one day he will be free of drugs. Until then he must learn his lessons the hard way. Until then my task is to be patient and try to do the things I don't understand but are necessary to help him with his discovery and recovery.
Sad to have a fathers day with him incarcerated? Yes, but I also have two great daughters.