Thursday, March 8, 2012


I just finished reading two very enjoyable posts by Syd over at I'm just F.I.N.E. -- Recovery in Al-Anon. About a week ago he posted that he was taking questions. Although I have been very public in my posts I have decided to open myself up to questions in the same manner as Syd. Syd offered a prize for the best question and I do not envy him in making his decision, there were some very good questions. I don't need that additional decision making stress so each of you get a prize. Drumroll please,  an honest and probably incoherent answer to your question. Please fire away.

It seems I have run into a block about writing. I am busy answering many private e-mails I receive from parents. I feel an intense drive to answer these e-mails when someone writes me. I think about the beginning of our journey and how those feelings overwhelmed us to the point that all we did was sit and cry. To have a mother or father look for help so desperately that they sit down and write a complete stranger; I know that place too well in which they have found themselves.

I still am reading blogs and commenting, although less than I use too. It is not because I don;t care it is just that I see so much wisdom in the comments and the writer's post seldom there is anything I can add of value.


Syd said...

Ron, I'm glad that you are going to do this. I am curious about how you were able to get to a place of peace and serenity in your life. So my question is:
Do you have a specific 12 step recovery program? If you do how did it help you? If you don't, how were you able to reach an understanding of powerlessness and letting problems go?

Barbara said...

Can I ask two questions? I'll assume I can, here they are:

1. Have you ever followed your gut regarding Alex rather than going along with the typical "do's and dont's of relating to an addict"? If so, what was the situation and how did it work out?

2. How did you and Darlene meet?

Anonymous said...

Did you have any 'god moments' when dealing with your son's addiction that you could share?

Anonymous said...

How long was your son using before you became aware that he had a problem? And what were the first signs?

Cathy said...

Ron, Recently you commented on Barbara's blog that when Alex was first in recovery you experienced "convoluted dark thinking" for a long time. I feel like I am in that place myself. My son has been in recovery for 3 months now but I can't seem to move forward. I tend to spend a lot of time reflecting/dwelling on the last several years of living in "crisis mode" 24/7. I'm in a pretty rough place. How did you move forward from that way of thinking? Thanks

Annette said...

Ron, I look forward to your answers. Some good questions here!

My question is: How have you reconciled Alex's right to privacy as you blogged about his addiction and shared his story at schools? Did you have his permission, what about while he was in active addiction?

You probably have picked up on some of the struggle I have had with this issue myself. I feel the need to honor my girl's privacy, but on the other hand, I feel strongly the need to reach out to other parents who are scared to death about their own child's addiction. Not to mention we live in a small town...our school could use some personal first person experience on this topic, but it won't be me, because too many people know me and my family in this area. Some in my family are very very private....thus not often mentioned in my blog.

Anonymous said...

In my job as a social worker in an
inner city pediatric clinic, I talk with preteens and teens daily.
I have an opportunity to talk with them casually about substance abuse. I'd like to do some preven-
tion work with them. What can I say to them that they may actually hear and remember? All suggestions are appreciated.