It seems to get tougher and tougher to find things to write about on this blog about addiction. Addiction is no longer front and center in our life. We don't take a breath and hold it like it was so easy to do for so many years. We allowed addiction to consume our lives. I'm sure so many of you know that feeling and may still be living in that manner.
I don't know what tomorrow holds but for today I am going to be conscious of life today and enjoy the peace.
Sometimes I think hard about, "What really happened for seven years? What have I REALLY learned? How did we survive? What caused this change in our life?" I'm sorry but I really don't have any solid answers. This sometimes troubles me but I am trying to let go of my need for a concrete answer to these issues. I guess I have to learn with some things "it is what it is."
Now I am satisfied with just trying to relate our experiences to others. Hopefully, it will help them through the nightmare or it will persuade a young person not to follow a path to addiction.
The little things matter as we relate to our son. A, "thank you" that is sincere. A text message or phone call that isn't originating from a police station. Having an open change jar in our bedroom that is slowly filling with silver. Hearing the words, "Mom, I'll get that diaper." Watching him take responsibility with his own health insurance card. Some people not experienced with addiction may read this and think, "Big deal." Yes it is, it is a big deal.
My son is someone I enjoy being around. Couldn't say that with honesty a few years ago.
Where there is life there is hope. But isn't just about hoping for your son, daughter or loved one to stop using. That's certainly part of it but life is happening all around us and allowing addiction to steal life from us is a terrible waste.