On January 17, 1982 my father passed away. There are no more phone calls, no father/son chats, no impromptu visits and no one asking or to ask for help.
I don't have to go to a cold snow covered frozen ground at a cemetery and stare at a spot on the ground to honor my father. You see, my dad does not lay there. My dad is not gone, he lives every day inside of me. His wisdom comes from my mouth as my words. His knowledge is passed along to others; how to square a door, righty tighty lefty losey and so much more that seems just natural to my world.
This is how I honor my dad, "The world is give and take." said he. Make sure your account is always balanced.
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8 comments:
Like father, like son.
This was beautiful, Ron, and an important reminder.
the loss of a parent never goes away. my mom has been gone now 26 years, i miss her daily. i share your memories, and your grief.
dawn
His legacy lives on and you share it with us every time you post. Thank you and here's to a great man.
That's a long time ago, I mean you must have been quite young it must have been difficult, considering it makes you head of your own family in a way you're not when your Dad is still alive. I actually have too many parents: 4. That's what divorce and remarriage does. i've been told a few times I should never complain about this and as I get older I understand more and more why not. For one thing I have a living memory of who I was when I was too young to remember. Stupid stuff like I liked grapes since I was a baby. If my Mum wasn't around to tell me this would never pass my mind when I eat them by the bunch now. At least if you're able to pass on his wisdom then the continuity is alive and that is the whole point. Wouldn't it be nice if you could pass this down. I know this is what you were thinking I hope you can forgive me for saying it aloud.
My Father passed away in 1993; and my Mother passed away in 2006; and I miss them both very much. I also miss the conversations very much. I have one brother who lives about 450 miles away; and when we are talking we often bring up something from the past, and one or both of us would say, "Ohhhh, I wish Mom were here to ask her...she would know." My brother is taking a welding class one evening a week, and he is using my Dad's welding equipment (at least some of it), which I think is very cool and quite a tribute to my Dad.
Your post was lovely Ron.
Ron:
I lost my Mom in 1985 when I was 25. My Dad died 10 years ago. I miss them all the time, but especially when I have faced challenges with my children. I always wished they were here to give me advice, to reassure me that my decisions with my addict were sound. It never occured to me until reading your post that their compassion and wisdom live on in how I choose to handle my sons illness. This will give me greater confidence in my decisions from this point forward. Thank you for making this so clear to me.
Lisa
I am glad that you honor him every day. That is such good thing.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is great to see that his wisdom lives on in you. I lost my mom when I was only 18, but my dad is still in good health at 87. I think he is trying to make up for me losing my mom so early.
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