Saturday, May 21, 2016

Pinch Me, Am I Dreaming

Six years ago in May and June of 2010 we were discovering how deep our son's addiction had progressed. We were in shock and after the shock wore off we snapped back to a stark reality. We began discussing what no parent should have to consider. Darlene and I began openly discussing what happens if our son dies.

We began discussing funeral arrangements, we drove through the cemetery down the street looking at open spots. Our heart was broken and we had not given up but we had resigned ourselves to a horrible eventuality.

Our despair was so evident I allowed myself to post about what we expected in July 2010.

Last night we attended the Commencement Exercises at Johnson County Community College. In the Commencement Program this was printed:

Associate of Arts and Science

I know many that read here have loved ones still struggling. I guess the only advice I have is to always look towards tomorrow. No matter how bad it may seem none of us know what will happen tomorrow, we don't even know what will happen the next minute or second.

Never give up, never stop loving and never stop taking care of yourself. People need you and your loved one needs you too if that day comes when they have a profound experience and enter recovery.

Needless to say I am proud of my son. This is just one step. In these six years since 2010 he has bought a house, works a full time job, is a father to three wonderful children and loves a partner as we all wish we could and should. 


Anonymous said...

Oh, that's a beautiful thing. Congratulations to Alex on all of his accomplishments and hard work! Congrats to you and Darlene, too!

Ming said...

Happy for you all that you are in a good place now... but don't you feel as though you are living life waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak? Constant fear of a relapse and your worst fear being realized.

I always have that fear in the back of my mind, always.

Dad and Mom said...


I did for a while but I have gotten past that point and now just live for the life given.

cy said...

This is wonderful to read about your family.

Tori said...

WOW! That is wonderful! He has accomplished so much you have every right to be proud!

Anonymous said...

Just wonderful news! Congratulations!

My Son's Battle- A Christian Mother's Heart said...

This is wonderful! I too am in the process of watching my son bloom into who God created him to be. Never give up! Never stop loving... and right on target- never stop taking care of yourself. Taking care of yourself is the first step in helping your child.

David Wyman said...

It felt like I was in a dream when my son came in the door one night, tripping on 3 tabs of LSD. He fell on the living room couch in front of me and my wife and started crying. He looked at me and said, "Dad, you were right. I should've stayed out of the lifestyle I have found myself in. If you are still willing to help me after all I've put you through, I want to get clean." It felt like the person I had raised had finally woken up, after a long rest.

Elevation said...

This is such a beautiful account of a beautiful story. It's so uplifting to be able to read the hope you've shared with your son and his journey, as well as yours being apart of his recovery. All too often we forget how there are success stories-- that life can be wonderful and that people can change.
Congratulations to you and him.

Peter Dimaira said...

I am so amazed there are parents out there like you two are. It's quite refreshing as my father is a dry drunk and my mother is a nurse, both were aware of the addiction issues I had growing up, but had no clue how bad I really was. I am sober now 8 years and strive to be a better person everyday. I also work for a Men's Rehab Program called Bright Futures Treatment Center and I watch men recover everyday and it's a blessing to see this. God Bless You All!