Monday, February 6, 2012

The Benefits of Focus and Love

Alex and his family comes over and Darlene and I both sit in amazement and pride at where we all are today.

Alex has taken on a lot, he takes responsibility for not only Tyler but Kristy's girls too. He and Kristy are good parents. Truth is I think Alex has more patience than I did as a new dad and he didn't get to grow with the situation. He jumped into the deep end with girls that are 8 and 9 plus add in a new baby.

It's funny for us to hear him talk about sitting at the scorers table during the girls basketball games. We melt when we see him walking Tyler and talking softly when Tyler is fighting sleep. The girls play games at our house and fight over Darlene's new I-Pad. Tyler is inquisitive, normal baby, touch it, grab it, put it in your mouth.

Darlene and I talked last night after they left following the Super Bowl. We know the old saying, "Pride goeth before the fall." But we can't help but think back to a time not that long ago and feel the intense fear and know how far away we are from that today. But today is what we get and we have learned to relish in the actions and gifts we are given in the moment.

A big point of personal learning for me has been to be able to accept the concept sometimes what you are given is all you get and all someone has to give. Alex has given me the gift of life. I have learned to accept it day to day. I have all my life to be sad, angry and impatient. Maybe tomorrow I'll be that way but today I am choosing to be happy, proud and grateful.


Terri said...

It must be one of those days. I just posted along similar lines. I agree with everything you said.

Erin said...

"Maybe tomorrow I'll be that way but today I am choosing to be happy, proud and grateful"

Amen to that Ron.

Tori said...

Ron...I love hearing that Alex is doing so well. It is such a struggle for them and perhaps having a family and children that he is responsible for helps him stay focused on recovery. It cant be easy for him.

I want to thank you for sharing the difficulties you have faced as well just within yourself. It is an awful feeling to think your are alone with so much torment when frankly I should be celebrating his recovery.

Thank you for all you do!

Her Big Sad said...

"But today is what we get and we have learned to relish in the actions and gifts we are given in the moment."


Momma said...

Today is a good day... Thanks as always for sharing. You have been such a good resource for me.

Debby of Oxycontin and Opiate Addiction: A Mother's Story said...

It's wonderful to hear the gratitude you are feeling. You've been through a lot. I've read our posting that were painful, filled with anger at ties, frustration and resolve. I'm so glad that are able to bask in Alex's recovery, and his new family. He has come a very long way, and I pray that he will continue to walk that path has only good things on the horizon.

Syd said...

I am glad that Alex is where he is today. And it is today where he is. That's okay and a good place to be. Nice to have your family together and enjoying the day.

Dawn said...

Thank you for sharing all that you have along this journey. I am so happy for you, Alex and the whole family! Hoping one day that all of us parents of addicts can one day share a similar story of our own. Always have hope... Thanks for giving us hope Ron!

Maija said...

I love Happy!! Enjoy it!!!