Friday, June 17, 2011

Father's Day Coming Around, again

WOW, it's been a while since I last posted anything and I can remember so well not too long ago there was a need inside me to write sometimes twice a day. I guess we are getting better here.

I have to believe for many, or at least for me, Father's Day is somewhat bittersweet. As a few people reading this may know my father died 30 years ago. So it isn't like I can say all the things I want to say or missed saying due to youthful inexperience in life. It just comes down to processing the learning and experience in my own way. Out of that I try to live a life of honor that respects not only my life but honors his legacy.

Out of my own experiences this father's day I am not dealing with or overly concerned about a crisis or emergency interrupting my day in fellowship with my family this Sunday. (maybe fools confidence)

However, my thoughts this year are not so reflective upon my own father and the lessons learned or missed but upon what does it mean to be a father. Wish I could share all the wisdom one needs to be a good father but I am still figuring that out. I'm not sure I'll get that equation right before I die but I'm working on it and I'm sure there is not one true answer to the equation either. All I can do is the best I can.

So for now all of us fathers can sit back on Sunday and enjoy our "designated" day. Meat on a blazing grill, we stand at the ready with a spatula in our hand and a smile on our face we can be on the top of the world no matter what the circumstances.

The horrors of years past are real. The not knowing if my son would live to another Father's Day can at times drive you to madness or paralyze you in fear. That is real for any parent of an addict but we need to remember it's not just the addict in our life that lives day to day. We all live that way. On no day are we guaranteed that when we see the sun rise that we will see the sun set. Father, mother, brother, sister no matter what you are or who you are it is your day every single day.


VJ said...

So true, so very true.

I will spend Father's Day with my son in jail again. You would think I would get use to it by now!

Syd said...

I am glad that this Father's day has a good chance of being a good one for you and Alex. May it be so!

Sherry said...

Happy Father's Day Ron!

Momma said...

I love this post. Have a wonderful Father's Day, and every day!

Thank you for your words.

Cathy | Treatment Talk said...

Hi Ron, That is wonderful that you plan a peaceful Father's Day. Enjoy it!

Dee said...

Happy Fathers Day! And thank you for passing along so much of your wisdom.

Anonymous said...

Lovely. Thank you.

lulu said...

THIS gives me hope in a seemingly hopeless situation.
I appreciate all that you share.
Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Your comment about none of us having a guarantee that we will see another day really hit home with me, and I will carry it with me. So much of what I have done to enable my son I did because I was afraid if I didn't help him it would lead to his eventual death. I'm learning to stop enabling, finally. From now on, when he asks for cash, I'm going to visualize myself handing him a bottle, or meth. That will help me stop. I will leave my son's future to God, where I should have left it a long time ago. Thanks, Dad, for your honesty and sincerity. You're making a difference in many lives.