I am still a member of several Facebook Groups concerning addiction and drug use. Sometimes I'll respond to a post by a parent but mostly I just read the activity. I also read blogs but they seem to be a dying medium.
Still a lump comes to my throat and my stomach knots when I read a post from a distraught parent. "I don't know where my child is tonight." "Pray for my child, in the hospital, overdose." "My child is going to court and could be locked up for five years." I could have and did write many lines just like these.
I know the pain of each of these parents. It is a painful agony to watch a child suffering from addiction. The feeling of helplessness when you are doing everything you know to save their life.
Does it ever get better? No, it gets different. (give me a break. I know the grammar doesn't work.)
Our son entered recover in July 2010. We lived seven years of a nightmare. I know the highs of endless hope and I know the crushing pain of a relapse.
Fear still grips me for every parent that writes about their son or daughter struggling with the monster. (another chance to correct me, i know it is a disease, but I LIKE monster.)
A lump in my throat, a twisting in my gut, a tear on my cheek. This is what I live with even with a son who is clear and sober.
To every mother and father out there struggling through this nightmare; the only thing I can really say to help is, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Keep reaching out to us. We don't have that magic bullet to fix it but we have a hand to hold. We have a shoulder where you can cry. Most of all we UNDERSTAND.