tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post2838642969116833011..comments2024-01-26T03:02:18.654-08:00Comments on An Addict In Our Son’s Bedroom: 7 Truths About My Addict That Took 5 Years To LearnDad and Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14204246139693620329noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-11950477386070322852020-07-28T18:25:08.567-07:002020-07-28T18:25:08.567-07:00Teen challenge has a higher success rate versus ot...Teen challenge has a higher success rate versus other rehab programs. 👆Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10779861498332651300noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-7739241366532776412016-06-07T10:20:00.395-07:002016-06-07T10:20:00.395-07:00Thank you so much for sharing your experience. As ...Thank you so much for sharing your experience. As the mother of an addict, I çan certainly relate to the 7 truths. My challenge is letting him go and live the consequences of his decisions...while trying to find some peace with this, knowing that it's the right thing to do.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-82800934763455675672015-09-29T18:55:53.364-07:002015-09-29T18:55:53.364-07:00Tough love may be the answer for some but it is no...Tough love may be the answer for some but it is not the answer for all. It's called setting boundaries for herself. It is possible to love the addict and not the addiction. It involves relearning the role of a mother. Tough to do but very worth the effort. It isn't about putting the love aside or throwing away her daughter at the expense of her health. My advice is to find someone that can help with the CRAFT model of dealing with an addicted loved one. Try these books, "Beyond Addiction" or Get Your Loved On Sober". Both very good. There is more you can do besides throwing them out and tough love. Good Luck, Ron Dad and Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14204246139693620329noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-89320571051149012332015-09-29T08:47:49.677-07:002015-09-29T08:47:49.677-07:00Your blog helped me come to grips with my son'...Your blog helped me come to grips with my son's addiction and coping with the fact we had to let him go. Out the door on a winter night in the Midwest with a broken ankle and crutches. (he tried climbing out a second story window and we found him on the deck in the am...)<br />I am trying to help another mom understand. She knows her daughter is an addict but her daughter has medical medical needs she worries about. She has had 2 major heart surgeries in the past few years and is supposed to check in with a heart doctor daily. She can't bring herself to kick her out of the house. Any ideas? I love my friend and hate to see the family keep suffering.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-66258472082871274792015-07-02T15:47:20.210-07:002015-07-02T15:47:20.210-07:00It is an old maxim, but oftentimes, the only ones ...It is an old maxim, but oftentimes, the only ones that can help people are themselves. What this means is that we do not abandon our duties or our vigilance, but they have to want it for themselves above all else. Change should always begin from within. Anyway, thank you for sharing your thoughts on the matter. Good day!<br /><br /><a href="http://thegoodlifetherapycentre.blogspot.com/2015/04/vancouver-counselling-expert-holds.html" rel="nofollow">Natalie Lamb @ Good LifeTherapy</a> Natalie Lambhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08711703760472371413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-84649381264393373422015-03-17T20:39:38.806-07:002015-03-17T20:39:38.806-07:00Nice article! Thank you for giving a time to share...Nice article! Thank you for giving a time to share your story to everyone. I appreciate your kindness in helping the parents who experience the same thing. It shows that your son’s struggle to his addiction has taught him and you at the same time a lot of lessons in life. I can feel how you really care for him to the point that you try to fix everything. I guess you tried even convincing him to undergo treatment addiction rehab but still you end up frustrated. But you didn’t give up quickly that’s why your son was able to get clean and sober. It’s a good thing that you are able to be brave and strong, staying at his side during his struggle will totally pay off. Good luck to you and to your son’s recovery.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08863755779638148771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-12975019416409960622015-02-27T03:33:20.250-08:002015-02-27T03:33:20.250-08:00This information is very important for those paren...This information is very important for those parents who wants their child to be sober as well as to those addicts who want to leave addiction.John bentrickhttp://www.sober.com/directory/profile?rehab=seastone+of+delray&city=delray+beach&state=florida&facility_type=tcnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-35615081630710227662015-02-18T08:42:51.675-08:002015-02-18T08:42:51.675-08:00What sucks is how family members do everything the...What sucks is how family members do everything they can over and over until they too are exhausted and emotionally spent. What sucks is not being able to get the obsessive thoughts about the alcoholic/addict out of your head and spending every moment wondering if they are alive or dead. What sucks is not having a life because of addiction. Sydhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05642843245634635843noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-72530073957887259012015-02-09T17:42:44.225-08:002015-02-09T17:42:44.225-08:00My son is in recovery. After 5 years of addiction ...My son is in recovery. After 5 years of addiction he went into Teen Challenge (it started with teens but is an adult program as well just separate facilities) , a 14 month Christian program that does not charge except for an entry fee. My son is changed. His addiction has been removed. He has only been out 5 months and has a ton of maturing to do but he is changed. The comments on this blog are so true. It was not until I went to Celebrate Recovery was I able to heal from my co dependency and act in a manor that left my son no choice but rehab or homelessness. The message we often give to our addict it that they are losers. It is hard to separate the sin from the sinner. It was not until I was in Celebrate Recovery for over a year that I could LOVE my son but hate his sin. If I did not get the help I needed (and belive me I was as broken as they get). I lived with the shame of having a drug addict for a son. I viewed it as my fault, I felt that I must have done something wrong. I withdrew from all friend and most family and lived in my own world of darkness. I did not look at it as a disease. It is not just a disease of the addict. It is a disease of the family. The family needs as much treatment as the addict or the addict will not get well and he may not anyway. I am actually a better person because of my sons addiction. I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE SAID THAT 3 YEARS AGO!. But I am. I am kinder more patient and more loving. I have learned to surrender my controlling behaviors and I live in a peace I never thought possible. Addiction is a very difficult disease and so many families don't get the right help. Lindanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-28434251699075152742015-02-09T17:11:44.052-08:002015-02-09T17:11:44.052-08:00Dear Anonymous, (you guys suck)
If you read more ...Dear Anonymous, (you guys suck)<br /><br />If you read more of my blog you will see I understand that a person addicted doesn't like what they are. I know addiction is a disease. I know everyone suffers but I also know that parents cannot help anyone even themselves till they understand the world in which THEY live too. <br /><br />Some day through all of us, including you we might be able to remove the stigma of addiction and then people can get help just as others get help and compassion in treatment like others suffering from diseases we don't understand or have a cure for yet.Dad and Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14204246139693620329noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-34590360129918788792015-02-09T11:29:10.548-08:002015-02-09T11:29:10.548-08:00You guys all suck. Placing the blame soley on the ...You guys all suck. Placing the blame soley on the addict. Yeah it's a choice but others shit on them until they just don't even want to live anymore...but hey it's their choice, because who wouldn't want to live in a world where they are labeled as a junkie scumbag criminal, even by their families. Whatever though it is what it is, cool story bro.<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-32747829728416361782015-02-09T09:48:38.218-08:002015-02-09T09:48:38.218-08:00It takes courage and caring to share your experien...It takes courage and caring to share your experience. We have faced this struggle ourselves. Finally, after 7 years our son has decided to change his life. I pray for the families of addicts and the addicts themselves every day. It's nice to know that we are not alone. Everything you said is so true. God bless you and your son. Karrienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-33235794946310537002015-02-09T09:07:24.357-08:002015-02-09T09:07:24.357-08:00Thank you for sharing this with us. I hear you lo...Thank you for sharing this with us. I hear you loud and clear. My son has been clean and sober for 13 years now but it was (and still is sometimes) quite the ride. One of the things I was told at one point was that I was loving him to death. That was very true although it was hard to hear. We think if we love them enough they will quit. Not true! If we love them enough we have to let go and let God take care of them for us. <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-2446490216420898442015-02-08T22:20:59.117-08:002015-02-08T22:20:59.117-08:00Hi Ron, thank you so much for sharing this. I'...Hi Ron, thank you so much for sharing this. I'm so sorry for your pain, and I understand. I'm an Addictions Therapist in Vancouver, Canada, and I work predominantly now with the loved ones of addicts - people just like you - because there is so little help for them out there. I'm also a recovering addict with many years clean - and I've lost people to addiction as well. You can see more about me at www.candaceplattor.com.<br /><br />I'm very grateful for all the points you made about choice - and I couldn't agree with you more. Whether or not addiction is a disease, and even though there is clearly brain involvement - underlying all of that, addiction is a choice. If that wasn't true, there wouldn't be people like myself who are in recovery from it. <br /><br />And I appreciate what you said about the parents (and other loved ones) being enablers. Enabling an addict is never a loving act, and parents need to get help for themselves too, so that the entire family system can heal.<br /><br />You've written an amazing article, and I'm going to share it with a lot of people. Thank you.Candace Plattorhttp://www.candaceplattor.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-10090991563116858242015-02-08T09:43:37.286-08:002015-02-08T09:43:37.286-08:00Good reading and all very true. Takes us time to r...Good reading and all very true. Takes us time to realize it ....<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6644974106128239775.post-73940805463060485792015-02-07T18:10:37.436-08:002015-02-07T18:10:37.436-08:00Thanks Ron for sharing your experiences with your ...Thanks Ron for sharing your experiences with your son. It is so great that you are willing to help other parents who are on this journey. Take care!Cathy Taughinbaughhttp://cathytaughinbaugh.comnoreply@blogger.com